Uncontrollable laughter

I was sitting in the diner the other night for a quick bite finishing my grilled chicken wrap (whole wheat, of course) with lettuce and onion when a guy dressed to the nine walks in and sits two stools away from me.

This guy looked like Gordon Gekko. His suit and shirt was so perfectly pressed his nipples must have hurt from all of the starch.

He ordered a cheeseburger deluxe and a soda.

I was reading the paper and so was he. We were actually both reading the Wall Street Journal.

Next thing you know, I hear a plastic cup drop and him screaming, “OH FUCK! God damn it. Shit. I need some napkins. Shit. Fuck me!” His coke had spilled all over him.

Not sure whether it was his reaction which was pretty normal or just the fact that 30 seconds earlier he looked like he could have played a role in the movie Wall Street but it was absolutely hilarious.

Fucking hilarious, if I may.

I began this uncontrollable laughter. Like one of those laughs when you’re in school and you need to stop laughing or else your teacher is going to kill you but you can’t control it laughters.

I am bad. I tried to contain it but I couldn’t. He saw me laughing and I felt terrible. I said, “I’m sorry and that I was just reading an article that really got to me,” as I was laughing almost uncontrollably.

He bought it for about .1 seconds and told me it was alright. That he would be laughing too.

I really couldn’t control myself. Even now just thinking about I start laughing. It’s the initial, “Oh shittt!!!” that I can’t get out of my head with the sound of the plastic cup dropping.

Long story short, we began talking. I told him about my company and he told me that he makes excuses all of the time.

Case in point: The guy was eating a cheeseburger deluxe.

Well, the guy is now a client.

Welcome to the revolution Larry. This might be one of the best stories I have of signing up a client. Thanks!

“If it looks as good as it does on paper, we’re in the kill zone, pal. Lock and load!”